the HOT guy is so not used to his BLACK-ness.

failed the first time, but luckily my hair decides to be less stubborn :D

it was a moody dayyy, I shall say. the morning was alright, but everything went down slope when I stepped out of my house.

the fact that I almost got ran down by a motor while going to work was disheartening. :c
then I had my lunch, which turns out to be DIN.CH.PER in the end, which was ICE BLENDED COFFEE!

and everything fell in place, I went to the toilet like once every 5 minutes, and it either comes out from the top or the bottom c: what a Spastic Colon, haizzz.

after my Ordeal, which I thought i would just die in the restroom without anybody knowing. .__.
I became like so moody and F-ed up. I would just lie dead on the counter and sleep. sigh,
but you know, being polite and all, i still smile to customers because they don't deserve to see my sad face.

and then at the end of the day, Jasmine called me to tell me the cashiering machine was short of money, scared the hell out of me. tsktsk.

It lasted like that for the whole day, okayyy. Because I thought I was going to be fine, 'cuz Someone, who said will come and visit me, will at least make me smile. In The End, that Someone just forgot about it all, c: which just dealt me another blow. I was done. I just couldn't care anymore.

And I know that you'll never read this, I think you don't even know I have a blog. c:
So I'm going to type everything.

Maybe it's a good thing that I didn't see you after-all.
If you came, I don't know what I would have done.
I really felt like hugging you for those moments, wanted to hug you so badly.
I don't need you to say anything to comfort me, but just to be there to hold me in your arms.
But at the same time, I am afraid you will repel. really,
I can't imagine how devastated I'd be if you repelled. and,
I didn't want you to see my weak side, to see me being all-so-fragile. I'm afraid..
I'm afraid of losing you, so I won't take the risk and even lose you as a Friend.